Picture this: did you do it told your best friend all about the person who has recorded your eye in ~ school. In fact, did you do it poured end details of your conversations, analyzed message messages together, and even strategized ways to confess her feelings (in the most chill means possible, of course). Then, all of a sudden, it happens. Your BFF starts dating that person that you had currently expressed interest in. What gives?

Unfortunately, the a situation that’s quite common, but that doesn’t do it hurt any kind of less. It can quickly leave you emotion hurt, confused, betrayed, and angry in its entirety — and understandably so. Not only are you taking care of the truth that someone else is date the human you like, however that someone is your finest friend. There’s a most layers to that sort of pain, and it’s no necessarily basic to transaction with.

You are watching: What to do if your friend likes your crush


Teen Vogue teamed up through licensed counselor Lauren Hasha to lug you part tips for coping v this an extremely scenario. Ahead, find out just how you can attend to this type of situation and also move front to repair what might be a broken heart.


1. Know that every one of your feelings room okay.


It deserve to be easy to second-guess your emotions and also wonder if you’re gift overdramatic, yet Hasha wants you to know that no issue what you’re feeling, it’s totally understandable. “Feelings choose anger, hurt, jealousy, mistrust, sadness, and also loss are completely expected in a situation like this,” she explains, through the reminder the we’re all unique, and therefore experience an adverse situations in various ways.


2. But it’s no okay to have to act on some of those feelings.

When civilization are overwhelmed v feelings favor anger, hurt, or jealousy, it can be tempting come lash out. But Hasha urges anyone to save in mind the talking and also communicating is much more effective 보다 doing other you can regret. “Don't go key your friend's automobile or spread out malicious rumors about them,” she advises while letting us know that “it is common to endure a full range of facility emotions.”

3. Shot talking the out through your friend, particularly if lock knew you chosen the person.

See more: The Best Songs With Stars In The Title Or Lyrics ? 100+ Songs With Stars In The Title

If you had spent a lot of time chatting v your BFF around your crush, it can feel extra confuse if something start brewing in between them. In Hasha’s opinion, it’s completely acceptable because that you to interact that hurt, but she advises come “stay away from accusatory statements like ‘You entirely stabbed me in the back!’” She notes that accusing her friend choose this can make lock defensive.

As one alternative, shot saying miscellaneous like: “I felt hurt as soon as I witnessed the news of you and dating, due to the fact that I had connected my feelings about that person to you.” Hasha also suggests sharing what friend would have liked come see occur instead, such as: “It would have actually been helpful for me if you had talked come me around it first, to provide me time to process before you men started open minded dating.”